Friday was “Grandparent’s Day” at my grandchildren’s school.  First, there was a delightful program in the auditorium and then a tour of the campus. It was a lovely day, and as I watched grandparents interfacing with their grandchildren and saw their excited faces, it brought home how important relatives are to children, and how the extended family provides the bonds that strengthen.  Through them, a child has roots.  They help define who he is, where he came from and perhaps where he is going. Grandparents, aunts and uncles can enhance the story and history of a family as well as provide wisdom, direction, guidance, and of course love. And when they are absent, the nuclear family is poorer for it.

My daughter once told me that one of the reasons she tried to walk the straight and narrow was because if she didn’t, she’d have to face her grandparents and all her aunts and uncles.  Hilary Clinton once said that it took a village to raise a child.  I don’t believe it.  But it does take a family and I include in that, the extended family. 

It’s easy for grandparents and uncles and aunts to be caught up in their own lives. We live in a world that seems to whirl faster and faster with each passing day.  But in such a world it’s more important than ever to keep connected and to be part of the glue that strengthens those we love.

Until next week,

Sylvia

This week I had the pleasure of spending a few days with my grandchildren.  It made me realize, again, what a blessing grandchildren are, truly gifts from God to be appreciated and enjoyed.  But as in other areas, I’ve learned that here, too, there are general guidelines that help keep that experience the pleasure it should be.  I’m certain that as I continue in my role as grandparent, I’ll be learning many more, but for now I’ll pass alone these five points to remember.

1) You’re the grandparent not parent.  That means your grandchildren’s parents have the right to make the rules and you should respect them.

2) Young grandchildren, especially, want their grandparents to sit on the floor with them and play.  Do as much of that as possible.  Remember, they’ll get older, and soon enough the time will come when hanging around with their friends will be more important than sitting down and spending time with you.

3) Even so . . . your grandkids have more energy than you do.  They’re younger and that will never change.  Keep up the best you can, but know when to say, “I’m tired, I can’t play anymore.”

4) Though training and providing direction is important, remember your grandchildren get enough of that from their parents (or should).  It’s more important for grandparents to show unconditional love and support and encouragement.  Dispense lots of praise and kisses, and a minimum of criticism.

5) Even so . . . not everything your grandchild does will be “wonderful”.  Dispensing truth in love at important moments can give your grandchild a deeper respect for your opinion and judgment, as well as your insights and wisdom.

Grandparents have a wonderful opportunity to model the unconditional love of God, while having some of the most rewarding times of their lives.  Now that’s a blessing that’s hard to beat!

Until next week,

Sylvia